Maybe I just care too darn much.

Bawal magpanic.

One thing at a time, Bea. One thing at a time.

I have long wanted to journey into my own 365 project, yet I was always hesitant because I knew that there's a 93.457421% possibility that I won't be able to follow it through. A bolt of lightning struck me though, so with a mix of a current of electricity from the heavens and my current BV state direly needing some sort of serotonin synergist, http://bealogy.blogspot.com/ suddenly and spontaneously took birth.

Birthdate: January 28, 2010, 9:34 PM

Birthplace: Starbucks Anson's

Type of delivery: Normal spontaneous delivery (term)

The bottom line is I'm bored and stressed (and I amazingly caught Podium's free wifi from the other side of the street), and so I made a 365 project. I just hope I live up to it.

I should be studying, but I just have to take note of these awesome blogs that I stumbled upon:

http://friedaquilter.blogspot.com/

http://dandelion-parachutes.tumblr.com/

http://nothingspaces.com/blog/

Inspiring and lovely! :)

We Are Family

I was supposed to wake up at 6AM so I could do a brief jog and wake up my hibernating muscles, but yet again, my alarm failed me. Or was it I who failed my alarm? I snoozed it forever and ever until I finally woke up three hours later than I should have. Oh, well. Still, Hello to a beautiful Sunday morning :)

So last night, I was at Starbucks, where I spent half of my time enjoying my coffee and reading magazines. I missed reading and just lazing around with a nice, relaxing cup of caffeine like this, not worrying about anything for a bit. The other half of my time I used on finishing two transes. Yes, I study slow, but at least I got some work done.

Then I got hungry, so I transferred to Dunkin Donuts and had my favorite Bunwich. I was being productive, when this family stepped in. A mom, a dad, two late adolescent boys and one 6 to 8-ish year-old kid. The youngest seemed to have ADHD, because once he got near the counter, he kept on shouting and tugging on his mom's top and pointing and nagging and AAAAHHH! He was really loud as in LOUD. The kind of loud that bounced off from all four walls of the room, the kind of loud that still rung inside your ears even after the loudness. I also knew that he had ADHD because he wasn't allowed by his parents to have donuts or drink sugar-y Dunkin Donuts drinks at that time of day because it'll make him more jittery and energetic.

But it doesn't end there. Their whole family was actually noisy. The mom couldn't decide which of the six nutty choco donuts displayed had the most nuts on it and kept asking if she could have more nuts on her donut. The eldest brother was asking about this combo and that combo and he just kept asking in circles. The second son could not wait to have his one choco honey-dipped muchkin. And the youngest kept screaming "pahingi ako niyaaan!," "mama, gusto ko 'nuuuun!," and "pansinin niyo naman akoooo!" His mom kept ignoring him an continued asking about nuts on her donut.

What's worse was that the four of them--the mom and the three kids--were wailing all at the same time. And they spent around 5-7 minutes on the counter before they were able to finish their order. Noise pollution, really, and not just because I was studying. They were plainly loud that the couple talking about their wedding preparations on the other table urgently left with stern looks on their faces (yes, I eavesdrop sometimes hihi).

Good thing the dad was just seated there, relaxed and all, as if he was so used to such chaos. I was a getting a bit pissed because their voices were literally hurting my ears already, but then the mother told the cashier and manager this: "nakilala niyo na ang pinakamagulong pamilya sa balat ng lupa."

And I don't know, my straight lips just turned into a small smile after hearing that. Their craziness still went on and on even if they were already seated (the father got the bunso some Boy Bawang to munch on while they all had coffee and donuts), but I didn't feel annoyed or anything anymore. Probably because I suddenly missed my own crazy family, and I realized that like this family, we also have our own quirkiness that's probably uniquely us, too. Other people may not understand, other people may smirk at us for it, but that's us. That's our family. And that's how we go. We're special like that.

I plugged my earphones into my ears and stopped eavesdropping so I could finally move on with my school life and stop minding other people's businesses. The family left after around 20 minutes, and I smiled at their youngest kid as he stepped out of Dunkin Donuts' door.

2 Cs

Consistency and clarity.

TODAY WILL BE PRODUCTIVE.

TODAY WILL BE PRODUCTIVE.

TODAY WILL BE PRODUCTIVE.

One step back.

Weirdest Dream

This is totally out-of-this-world, but I just have to blog about it: I dreamt that I was being raped through my pancreas and not through my vagina last night.

I KNOOOW, HOW. CAN. THAT. HAPPEN. Dr. Deo's lectures are so getting to me! WEIRD TALAGA! The GI tract, FTW! =))

Memories

I can't really remember much about my childhood (hello, infantile amnesia), but this has got to be one of the most salient things that made my younger years. And Little Lulu. Haha. I'm a Cartoon Network baby ♥

Binge-eater

It's only day 3 of the sweet sem break, but I already mutated into a pig. See what I devoured yesterday:

• Carbonara
• Pancit Palabok
• Pancit Bihon
• Puto Pao
• Double Dutch ice cream
• Isaw
• Ensaymada
• Ding Dong mixed nuts
• Siomai
• Fruits
• Coke
• Asado Siopao

Binge-eating much, I know. After controlling my food intake in the past weeks, I crashed and nomnomnom-ed endlessly. Bakit kasi ang sasarap ng pagkain dito sa Tanay?! Hahaha. But it will stop now. As in NOW. Back to eating smart! Of course I'll still enjoy myself, but moderation is the key forever:

• Eat in proper proportions
• No rice and carbs
• More fruits and vegetables
• Occasional sweets and pastries
• Less coffee
• More tea (and Gatorade, my new love)
• EXERCISE EXERCISE EXERCISE

I can't jog here in Tanay because there isn't a place that's conducive for jogging (or at least a place that I'm familiar with or at ease in), so I brought my Hip Hop Abs DVD. Haha.

I hope I lose and don't gain this sem break! For now, I will chill by watching Devil Wears Prada. Next movies: 21 and Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Yay!

So Many Questions

1. Why am I a mediocre in everything? I don't know what I'm good at anymore. It seems that all that I do end up in so-sos. It makes me sad.

2. Why are so many hearts breaking? I can't take it that a lot of people dear to me are experiencing what I experienced before. Love shouldn't hurt like that :(

3. Why am I thinking about you when I shouldn't anymore?

4. Why am I unmotivated? Oh I know that answer to this question: SEMBREAK. Three. More. Weeks.

5. I've been here before, but really, how do you actually know know?

GAAAAAAAH.

AGrkjhareQfG3495YGeDfk. E@grgeEgragfege*hknrgawefv. AKfhnebfrleseer45. hEkfnRERejrgWtgnjrs!!!!

fjfesjrefgfrstf.

@_@

:((

=((

:-s

:|



Who's stressed?

For My New Blog Reader

Welcome!

And thank you for today ♥

All Piled Up

Even my cute stuffed toy is pooped because of med.

Butterflies

Instantly fell in love with this mash up.

This song also rocks my socks.

Oh, love :)

It's during times like these when my passion, strength, and determination are tested.

Thankful

Everything's just so simple and safe and happy with you around :)

I am a stressed, fat, mediocre, and ugly med student who won't (or shouldn't) be sleeping tonight :(

It's 3:56 AM and I'm still all smiles.

Things that made me smile this weekend:

• Visiting UP
• Bonding with college pals
• Catching Up Dharma Down in Katipunan
• Having our picture taken with Armi
• Mushroom Burger
• No-whip green tea frap with hazelnut
• Zombie and Martini
• Yearbook meeting accomplished
• Getting semi-lost in Bambang
• A lovely set of scrubs
• Shared Wendy's Baconator
• Medical supplies shopping
• Marty's Baconette strips
• Red Horse
• Chill time
• A sweet revelation :)